|
|
Being an Only Child
I liked being an only child. No one touched or ran of with my stuff. No one pulled rank with my mommy and daddy. It was just me, nothing complicated. then one day at age six he whole of it changed. There was a lot of talk between the parents which had nothing to do with me. I knew something was up. Baby things were starting to clutter the apartment. Still nothing had been said and I wished so much that it was not so that I found a half dozen other reasons why these things were finding a place in our home. alas, then came the talk. That we have something "wonderful" to tell you talk. I'd known for some time my mother was unhappy with me, that was obvious. she rarely spoke to me at all unless someone was around to see her being mother-of-the-year. I played alone, ate alone, daddy was now the one telling em bed time stories. Having another baby was just another way to have me demoted, make me even more invisible. I sucked it up. I had to know that there were going to be consequences when I ratted on my grandparents, after all it put mummy solidly between the people she loved the most. I was not the priority. I could only be happy that at the very least I seemed to be my father's priority. I think he dreaded the coming of the new "baby" as much as I did. Likely for very different reasons, but he sighed a lot and looked wistfully off in the direction of the city. I think that mean either he was wanting to spend more time at work or he had a woman in the city. I think the latter, in retrospect. The sea of blue baby things were rapidly covering every table top and corner of the apartment. I was moved into the "larger room", my old room (to which I did have an attachment, the baby could have had the larger) was usurped for the new creature. "You're going to have a baby brother" announced my mother. "no," said I, "it's going to be a sister" That fell on deaf ears. Later that day I received a "male" doll, to get me used to the idea of having a little brother (despite dolls of the day having no genitalia at all). Now I was expected to get into the joyful preparations, not likely. All day long i spent in the shadow of the great belly, it hung over me ominously, followed me, sat on mother's lap instead of me. Clearly I had to find other accommodations, mom's lap was out. I could not help feeling that I was being replaced. I received further bribery, the toy shop with cash register that made a ringing sound, Meccano sets, Lego. My father spent more time with me now he was out of the armed forces and his studies had been completed. We worked on the aquarium together. Saturdays we would go to the local slough and catch water daphnia the fish would go nuts for them, Siamese fighting fish, Danios, tetras, gouramis. We had no television but I could spend hours watching the drama in the small 10 gallon tank. Mother grew ever larger, she looked like she was going to blow. Quirk in our family, we have elephant length pregnancies. I myself was born at 10 months gestation. This time mom made it through the 11th month. There were a good number of false alarms, each one fraught with drama and upheaval. This was going to be a home birth. towards the last week the midwife had moved in (what a zoo) and the doctor now visited with the belly daily. I was roused out of bed,my lovely warm bed, the midwife had her face just inches from mine. Not an attractive woman, she had maybe ten of her teeth left and her breath was most unpleasant, musky and sour all at once. "You have a little sister", she took me too mom's room where bloody linen was on the floor, the doctor and my dad were drinking and mom was looking, eyes glazed and tired. In the little crib was a good size baby, eyes wide open. I had met the enemy at last. Other Stories in this series will be posted every few weeks or so |